{selective} Hearing

We are having fish for dinner. I don't know what kind of fish, and I don't really care since I am not the one cooking it. All I know is that it is being grilled on an oak plank. Said oak plank needed to be soaked in water.

Husband said to me, have you soaked the plank. I said, What? No. I forgot.

Husband said, Where is a container large enough to soak the oak plank?

I said, try the bathtub.

Husband went outside and put said plank in the rainwater collecting container. Acid rain on the food. Delicious.

Husband then went on the internet to look up how long said oak plank needed to soak. As he did so, I browsed the parenting magazine from last month that has been lingering on the kitchen counter.

"Soak plank for....Tewnty..Four..Hours"

"24 hours!?!" I exclaim!

"Soak plank for at least Twenty MINUTES or up to Four Hours" husband retorts.

Talk about selective hearing.